1.

"I've had a had day at the office，dear，and I'm as hungry as a bear．Is dinner ready？"

"No love．I'm afraid we'll have to go to a restaurant tonight．I've broken the tinopener．"

晚饭

"亲爱的，今天办公室的活可真够累人的，我饿极了。晚饭做好了吗？"

"没有，宝贝。恐怕我们今天晚上得上饭馆去吃。我把罐头刀弄断了。"

2.



A party of visitors were being shown round a lunatic asylum．They came across one individual in the grounds，with wild eyes，dishevelled hair，feverishly endeavouring to catchflies and keep them in his pocket．

"His was a sad case，"said the attendant．"Whilst he was at the war his wife abandoned his home and ran off with another man．"

"Terrible，"said a visitor．

Presently they came to a padded cell，in which could be heard a raging as of a wild beast．

"That's the other man，"said the attendant．

两个男人

一群游客被领着参观一所疯人院。在院子里他们遇见一个人，他长着一双疯狂的眼睛，头发蓬乱，正狂热地设法逮住苍蝇，把它们装在他的口袋里。

"他的病很惨，"陪同人说。"在他当兵打仗的时候，他的妻子抛下他的家和另一个男人私奔了。"

"真可怕，"一个游客说。

不久他们来到一间安上软垫的小屋前，听见里面传出野兽般的怒吼。

"这就是那另一个男人，"陪同人说。

3.

One day a boy came to his teacher and said："Teacher，pawants to know if you like roast pig．"

"I certainly do，"said the teacher，"and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me．"

Days passed，and nothing more was said about the roast pig．

Finally the teacher said to the boy："I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig．"

"Yes，"said the boy，"he did intend to，but the pig got well．"

良好的心愿

一天有个男孩去对他老师说："老师，我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。"

"当然啰，"老师说，"去告诉你父亲，多谢他想着我。"

好几天过去了，再没提起烤猪肉的事儿。

最后老师对男孩说："我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。"

"是啊，"孩子说，"他是这么想的，可后来猪又没病了。"
关键字:笑话幽默
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