Susan: "Well, clearly, you were not paying attention, because I did go back to Mike the second he woke up, and he'd totally forgotten me!"



But none of that matters anymore 'cause..."



She stops and starts making choking noises. Toni turns back around.



Susan: "Bug."



Toni: "You know, the bugs can't get in if you keep your mouth shut."



EDIE'S HOUSE



Travers is playing a video game when Edie walks over holding a puppy.



Edie: "Travers. I have someone who wants to meet you."



Travers: "A puppy!"



Edie: "Yeah. You wanna hold him?"



Travers: "He's awesome. Are you gonna keep him?"



Edie: "No, he's not mine. He's yours."



Travers: "No way!"



Edie: "Well, way! I just rescued him from the pound. So. What you gonna call him?"



Travers: "Fenway. After Fenway Park."



Edie: "That is so cute! Everybody back home is gonna be so jealous."



Travers: "But, mom. I can't take him home. Dad's allergic."



Edie: "That's right. Shoot. Oh, I'm gonna have to take poor little Fenway back to the pound."



Travers: "No! Why can't I keep him here?"



Edie: "Well, you don't visit here very often, and--and I can't take care of a dog all by myself. Well, I don't know what else to do."



Travers: "Why can't I just visit you more?"



Edie: "Hey, that's a thought, and Carlos would love it, too. Of course, I don't know how your father would feel about joint custody."



Travers: "I'll talk to him. I'll tell him I want it."



Edie: "Really? Well, that would be great. But you better make sure that he knows that it was all your idea, okay?"



PINEWOOD VALLEY STATE FOREST - NIGHTTIME



Toni and Susan are sitting around a campfire.



Toni: "We're about three hours from the hot springs. So if we get an early start tomorrow, we should be there by lunch."



Susan takes out some face cream and scoops a handful onto her fingers.



Toni: "What are you doing?"



Susan: "Oh, it's a face mask. It's lavender and honey. You want some?"



Toni: "Honey, huh? So you're in the middle of the woods, getting ready to smear your face with bear food?"



Susan: "Well, I wanted to look nice for Mike."



Toni: "Lord knows I don't want to hear you talk about this anymore but what exactly do you think is gonna happen with you and this guy?"



Susan: "Well. I'm going to apologize, and then I'm gonna tell him that I made a huge mistake--"



Toni: "No, no, no, no. After that. Say he accepts your apology. You get back together, and then what happens? You know, after the novelty wears off?"



Susan: "Well, then. We'll just be happy."



Toni makes a face.



Susan: "Okay, I know it's dark, but I can see you."



Toni: "Look, after hearing your whole history with Mike it doesn't take a genius to figure out what the problem is."



Susan: "What is it?"



Toni: "You. You don't want to be happy. You're a drama junkie. When there is no drama, you create it. You sleep with your ex-husband, you cheat on a coma victim and now you're hiking up a mountain after a guy who has no idea you're coming. Who knows? Maybe this guy will take you back. But once the dust settles, you'll kick up some more because you don't know how to just be happy."



Susan: "You don't even know me. How dare you talk to me like that?"



Toni: "Ooh, so dramatic. I'm gonna turn in now."



Toni gets into her tent, leaving Susan alone by the fire. The next morning, Toni crawls out of her tent.



Toni: "All right, sunshine, let's get moving."



She looks over at Susan's tent, which is empty. There's a note waiting for Toni that says that Susan is going to look for Mike on her own and that Toni can carry Susan's gear back down.



FAIRVIEW MAIN STREET



Vern and Gabrielle are in Gabrielle's car, at a red light.



Vern: "What are you looking at?"



Gabrielle: "My city. It's like I'm seeing it for the first time. Everything looks different now that I'm First Lady of Fairview."



Vern: "Oh, my God. You did not just call yourself First Lady of Fairview."



Gabrielle sees the meter man from before.



Gabrielle: "Well, well, well. Who do we have here?"



Vern: "Oh, wouldn't you just love to rub his nose in your newfound power?"



Gabrielle: "Vern, you're just awful. And as it happens, so am I."



The light turns green and Gabrielle drives up to where the meter man is. She parks the car and gets out.



Vern: "Gaby, come on, I was just joking."



Meter Man: "Hey, lady. It's a hydrant. You can't park there."



Gabrielle: "Really? 'Cause I just did."



Meter Man: "Oh, you again!"



Vern: "Gaby."



Gabrielle: "Just stand back and enjoy the carnage."



The meter man writes out a ticket and hands it to her.



Gabrielle: "Thank you. Now what you're about to see may astound you."



She tears the ticket up and throws the pieces onto the ground.



Meter Man: "You know, I could give you another ticket for littering."



Gabrielle: "You could try, but you might not want to. See, I'm engaged to Victor Lang. Ring a bell? The mayor? Your new boss?"



Meter Man: "I don't follow politics."



Vern: "Let me know when the carnage begins so I can shield my eyes."



Gabrielle: "Listen, buddy, you're not getting it. You answer to me now. I could have you fired."



Meter Man: "You can't do nothing."



Gabrielle: "I can do whatever I want! In fact, my first official act of business as mayoress of Fairview...is to declare today free parking day!"



She begins going to all of the cars where there are tickets on the windshield and she grabs them all.



Meter Man: "Hey, knock that off. Hey!"



Gabrielle: "Free parking!"



Meter Man: "Give me that!"



Gabrielle: "No!"



Meter Man: "Give me that!"



He grabs her and twists her wrists as he tries to get the tickets from her.



Gabrielle: "Ow, you're hurting me!"



The sound of police sirens is heard.



Gabrielle: "You know what that sound is, fat boy? The sound of your career circling the bowl. Yeah, you're gonna find out what happens when you screw with the first lady of Fairview!"



Later, Gabrielle stares sullenly out the window of the police car that she was put in. The car drives off and the meter man looks triumphant.



PINEWOOD VALLEY STATE FOREST



Susan is hiking.



Susan: "Okay, north. I need north. Moss grows on the north side of trees."



She looks at a tree and then sees that the moss is growing all around it.



Susan: "What? Ugh, damn it! Stupid mossy trees!"



She kicks a tree and loses her balance, falling over a log.



OUTSIDE EDIE'S HOUSE



Charles comes up the sidewalk to pick up Travers.



Travers: "Dad!"



Charles: "Hey, hey, buddy! How you doing?"



Travers: "Good. Can I ask you a question?"



Charles: "Sure. You can ask me anything."



Travers: "How would you feel about joint custody?"



INSIDE EDIE'S HOUSE



Edie and Charles are arguing.



Charles: "You bought him a puppy?"



Edie: "No, I bought myself a puppy. How was I supposed to know that he'd get so attached?"



Charles: "Don't lie to me, Edie. You were trying to manipulate him."



Edie: "What? Would it be so terrible to have joint custody? In case you forgot, I am his mother."



Charles: "Two weeks out of the year, and that's the way you wanted it."



Edie: "Well, I changed my mind."



Charles: "Aw, damn it, Edie. We had an agreement!"



Edie: "It wasn't official! And there isn't a judge in this world that would keep a mother from her child."



Outside, Travers is sitting on the porch step with the puppy. Carlos comes over.



Carlos: "Hey, Travers. What's going on?"



Travers: "Mom and Dad are fighting."



Carlos: "You wanna go watch TV at my house?"



Travers: "Okay."



Carlos: "I'll see you there in a sec, buddy."



Travers leaves.



Charles: "You haul me into court, and so help me, I will destroy you!"



Edie: "You threaten me again, and I will go for full custody, you--you son of a bitch."



Charles storms out.



Carlos: "Oh, hi."



Charles: "Hey."



Carlos: "So. What is going on?"



Charles: "Edie has lost her mind. For eight years, she's been happy to see him two weeks a year. Now out of the blue, she's gotta have joint custody."



Carlos: "Really?"



Charles: "Yeah. And how's that supposed to work? We live four hours away. What's he gonna do, go to two different schools?"



Carlos: "I don't know what to tell you, man. I'm sorry."



Charles: "Yeah, thanks. You know, I just don't get it. Edie's been perfectly happy with our arrangement. What the hell's gotten into her?"



SCAVO RESTAURANT



The last two patrons leave as Lynette sees them out.



Customer: "Well, thanks."



Lynette: "Good night. Come again."



She locks the door.



Lynette: "There. Hey...I made you an espresso."



Rick: "Great."



Lynette: "You okay? You've been so quiet all night."



Rick: "I had lunch with Tom today."



Lynette: "That's funny. He didn't mention it."



Rick: "He asked me if I was sleeping with you."



Lynette: "What? I'm so sorry. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. That paranoid idiot. You know, I knew it. I knew when we were watching the surveillance tapes that he would completely misinterpret it."



Rick: "Oh, did he?"



Lynette: "Did he what?"



Rick: "Uh, did he misinterpret it? Or did he just see what is obvious that you and I can't admit?"



Lynette: "I don't know what you're talking about. There's nothing to admit."



Rick: "Lynette, how long are we gonna kid ourselves? I have feelings for you. I know you feel something for me."



Lynette: "Stop! Don't say it! You cannot say these things."



Rick: "Come on. We both know it's true. We've been flirting since we met."



Lynette: "Yes, flirting! That's it! It's what married people do, because we know there is a line you don't cross. And maybe I've gotten close to that line, and maybe I've enjoyed getting close to that line, but I have never once crossed it."



Rick: "Look, I know I don't have much to offer--"



Lynette: "And I have nothing to offer! I am taken! God!"



Rick: "Great, great. Now--now what, you're mad at me?"



Lynette: "Yeah, I'm mad! I am mad because I loved our nights together. It made me feel sexy and happy, and, God, how I needed that. And now it's over. You ruined it. You can't work here anymore."



Rick: "Wait...you're gonna fire me?"



Lynette: "Oh, jeez. What choice do I have?"



Rick: "Lynette. Lynette, please--"



He reaches for her and she backs away.



Lynette: "Don't touch me! You have to go now. Please, go. You have to go now. Go on. Go."



She goes into the back room.



PINEWOOD VALLEY STATE FOREST PARK RANGER'S CABIN - NIGHTTIME



Toni and the other park ranger are looking at a map.



Toni: "Her name is Susan Mayer, and she's never hiked before. Now this is the last place I saw her, but honestly, she could be anywhere."



Mike walks into the cabin and goes up to another park ranger.



Mike: "Just checking back in. The name's Delfino."



Ranger #1: "Delfino. Great. You're all set."



Ranger #2: "Are you sure she's lost?"



Toni: "Of course I'm sure. She's a dippy brunette from the suburbs. She didn't bring a compass. She brought makeup."



Ranger #2: "Wait, is she the one looking for the guy at the hot springs?"



Toni: "Yep, that's her. Now let's go find her before she falls off a cliff. The woman is a total klutz."



Mike finishes signing back in and leaves the cabin.



Ranger #2: "Yeah, I hear you."



Toni: "All right, we'll split up. I'll take north of the river here, and you look down in here."



Mike comes back in.



Mike: "Excuse me. This klutz...could you tell me her name?"



PINEWOOD VALLEY STATE FOREST - NIGHTTIME



Susan limps over to a tree and sinks down onto the ground. She dials a number on her cell phone and begins talking.



Susan: "Oh. Hey...Mike. Um, listen, I know your cell phone's off, but I...I wanted you to know that I followed you up to the hot springs, and...Now I'm lost. You know, in the off chance that I get devoured by a mountain lion, I--I just wanted you to know that, um...I love you. I've always loved you. And I don't want any more drama. And if you take me back, I promise there won't be. Unless I get eaten by a mountain lion, and, you know, that'll be dramatic, but it won't be my fault. Anyway, um...I hope it's not too late, but if it is, I just...I just want you to know that I am so, so..."



Her phone beeps, telling her the battery has died.



Susan: "Sorry."



She puts down the phone, then curls up on the ground to go to sleep.



VICTOR'S HOUSE



Victor is standing in front of the fireplace, watching the flames. Jerome brings Gabrielle into the room.



Jerome: "Here she is, sir. No charges, no press. Never happened."



Gabrielle: "Hi, honey. You look handsome in a tux."



Jerome: "Jerome, give us the room, please."



Jerome leaves.



Gabrielle: "All right, look, I know you're mad, but wait till you hear what that jerk did to me--"



Victor: "Gaby, shut up. Are you familiar with the quote 'From the one to whom much has been entrusted, even more will be demanded'?"



Gabrielle: "Um...doesn't ring a bell."



Victor: "From the Bible."



Gabrielle: "That explains it."



She laughs.



Victor: "This is not a joke! I have been elected mayor. Certain things are expected of me. One in particular is that my future wife not assault city employees."



Gabrielle: "He was mean. He deserved it."



Victor: "I don't care! Your behavior reflects on me, and I can't do my job if you're constantly humiliating me."



Gabrielle: "Constantly? Aside from today, give me one example."



Victor: "Okay, how about jumping into my arms like a ten-year-old at the election party?"



Gabrielle: "I was just joking around, being me. I thought you liked that."



Victor: "I do, in private. In public, you have to act like a grown-up."



Gabrielle: "Okay. I'm sorry I disappointed you. It won't happen again. I better get dressed. I don't want to be late to the victory party."



She starts to leave and Victor notices that Gabrielle is rubbing her wrist.



Victor: "What happened to your wrist?"



Gabrielle: "Oh. That's what I was trying to tell you. The meter man--he grabbed my arm and twisted it."



Victor: "What? My God, he left a bruise."



Gabrielle: "Mm, it's not as bad as it looks."



Victor: "Still, he shouldn't have done that."



Gabrielle leaves the room.



LYNETTE'S HOUSE



Tom is sitting up in bed when Lynette comes into the room.



Lynette: "Hey."



Tom: "Hey! You're home early."



Lynette: "It was kind of dead tonight. Hi."



She leans down and kisses him, accidentally pushing his head against the headboard when she pulls away.



Lynette: "Ooh, sorry. By the way, we are gonna need to find a new chef. Rick gave notice."



Tom: "He quit?"



Lynette: "Well, he got a better offer from some place across town."



Tom: "That's too bad.



Lynette: Well...whatcha gonna do?



Tom: Well...we don't have to hire someone. I am coming back."



Lynette: "You sure you're ready?"



Tom: "Yeah. Doctor said I can lose the back brace next week, and I promise I'll take it easy. No lifting-- just cooking."



Lynette: "Well, okay, then."



Lynette goes into the bathroom. She turns on the sink and then begins to cry. Outside of the bathroom, Tom leans against the door to keep talking to her.



Tom: "I feel really good about this, hon. I have been going nuts just lying around. This is gonna be so great! We're a team again. Besides...I missed you."



Lynette calms down a little bit.



Lynette: "I missed you, too."



She begins to sob again as she leans against the wall.



EDIE'S HOUSE



Edie is sitting on the couch, filing her nails when Carlos comes in.



Carlos: "Hey, Edie?"



Edie: "Well, hello, stranger. Come on in. So what's up?"



Carlos: "Nothing much. I hear you're going for joint custody of Travers."



Edie: "Yep. I hired a lawyer, and he is a real shark."



Carlos: "Wow, you're not messing around, huh?"



Edie: "I think it's important that Travers has his mother in his life. Of course, he'll probably want to spend more time with his video game buddy."



Carlos: "Yeah. You know, but I just keep thinking, um...what's all this gonna be like for him--you know, all the traveling back and forth?"



Edie: "He's a kid. He'll adjust."



Carlos: "Yeah, plus two schools, two sets of friends. I mean, it's not gonna be easy."



Edie: "Why are you being so negative? I thought you'd be excited about this."



Carlos: "I know you did. Um...I just want you to ask yourself, is this all really in the best interest of Travers? You know, kids need stability."



Edie: "What about what I need?"



Carlos: "I know that you miss him...and I know you're worried about being lonely, but I am going to be here for you."



Edie: "Yeah, once every two weeks."



Carlos: "No. I'm really going to be here for you. And I'm gonna make you happy."



Edie: "Don't say that if you don't mean it, Carlos."



Carlos: "I do."



Edie: "All right, I'll, um...I'll call off the lawyer. You know, I really am gonna miss him."



Carlos: "Yeah, me, too."



PARTY



A crowd of people are enjoying themselves. Jerome stands underneath a banner that reads "Congratulations Mayor Lang."



Jerome: "Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming the next mayor of Fairview--Victor Lang!"



Victor walks out onto the dance floor. Gabrielle joins him and they begin to dance.



WISTERIA LANE - NIGHTTIME



Two men approach the meter man, who is getting into his car.



Man: "Your name Jeff Scott?"



Meter Man: "Yeah."



Man: "You read meters for a living?"



PARTY



Victor and Gabrielle are still dancing.



Victor: "Do you know how much I love you?"



Gabrielle: "I think so."



WISTERIA LANE - NIGHTTIME



The two men begin beating up the meter man. He falls to the ground.



Mary Alice: "Anyone can end up a victim...injured by the actions of others. But whether the damage is inflicted by a cunning ex-wife...or a blow delivered by the object of our affection...the time comes when we must pick ourselves up and continue on our journey. And if we can't, then all we can pray for...is rescue."



PINEWOOD VALLEY STATE FOREST - MORNING



Susan wakes up to find Mike standing over her.



Susan: "Mike. I twisted my ankle."



Mike: "Good. 'Cause now I get to do this."



He scoops her up into his arms and kisses her.



THE END

关键字:绝望主妇第三季

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