酷兔英语

NEWSPAPER EDITION
2010-11-19 01:16

THIRTY years of China's one-child policy has led concerned parents to look online to find playmates for their lonely offspring.

The practice is jokingly called "child marriage," harking back to the now-abandoned custom of parents arranging their children's marriage.

"Child marriage' now does not mean the promise of real marriage. It just means close playmates," said bank worker Deng Hewei, the father of a one-year-old boy in southwest China's Chongqing Municipality.

Deng has found more than one "wife" for his boy among the daughters of his friends. "Because the parents are already good friends, the children get along easily," he said.

Some parents seek "child marriage" partners for their children through online postings. Some even upload photographs of their children.

"My only son is two and a half years old. He is very lonely. I want to find him a girl partner living nearby. Our two families can go traveling together," said one posting from "Recharge Card."

"We can play games together, share the children's toys, and discuss children's education," netizen "Smurfs" wrote in another online posting.

"The goal of 'child marriage' for me is finding more friends for my little daughter," a mother surnamed Qin who works for Coca-Cola in Chongqing wrote.

"Smurfs" and Qin belong to China's first generation of only children. Since China launched its family-planning policy, most couples have only one child, and those children have now come of age and are starting to marry and have children.

"We do not want our children to have a lonelychildhood like ours," Qin told Xinhua news agency.

"Smurfs" and Qin's views are commonly held by the many young couples who grew up as only children.

Now their children may be even lonelier as they will have no aunts or uncles.

"Living in high-rise buildings impedes communication between children and their peers, and more and more children lack interpersonal skills," said Qin Ke, a kindergarten teacher in southern China's Guangxi Zhuang Autonomous Region.

"The second generation of only children are used to depending on their parents and grandparents for everything. So they are more likely to be selfish and weak in the face of frustration," the teacher said.

Therefore, nowadays, young parents are trying various means, including "child marriage," to increase the number of relationships their only children have.

According to a survey conducted by the web portal sina.com, 67.1 percent of 1,279 respondents believed that "child marriage" helps relieve the loneliness of an only child while also improving their social communication skills. However, 50.3 percent reject the name "child marriage," even though it is just for fun.

Cao Zhaoyang, a professor of psychology at Shijiazhuang University in north China's Hebei Province, said that growing up alone is not good for mental health and self-awareness.

He said the "post-80s" parents' own experience has informed their views and that the idea of findingpartners for their only child is acceptable and worthwhile.

"However, it's not appropriate to call it 'child marriage' as the premature use of the husband and wife titles may block the child's normalcommunication with other friends," he said. Cao suggested parents simply call it "finding a partner for my child."